Can I hire someone?

Can I hire someone to break my shoes in?

You know the drill:

You are online shopping and you see them and and and they are on sale!

ahhhhhhhh shiiiiiiit

BUY it BITCH

and so the wait begins checking online every second to make sure your package is being

PREPARED 

ON ROUTE

yaaaaas its on the way

then its here!

the moment of truth

yes yes yes

Looking FLY AF

now lets take a few steps

FYAAAAA

You start thinking of all the social events you are gonna flash these bad boys:

but then....

2 minutes into making angels sing things turn

ok ok i got this

"SO i sit for most of the day anyways it will be fine"

It starts to sting so you check things make sure its copacetic

Fuck i Fucked Up I HATE THESE SHOES WHYYYY

SOMEONE GET THE BAND AIDS!!!

(note to self, do not GOOGLE "Hurt Ballerinas feet")

I purposely posted this pic because I almost barfed 

I feel the pain in my bones...
So yea can someone start a business and get the app rolling 
cool
thanks in advance

THE END

My Shoe Dance

When SH*! gets REAL

Are you ever at work just straight chilling

Browsing the internets you know

Sipping on yo coffee like:

soooo goooood amirite

but then you get this rumble:

and you are in denial because how could your delicious coffee betray you like that:

so you decide ok maybe I should start walking:

the accountant wants to chit chat with you about how the math is just not adding up and your like

Hold that thought BITCH

So you get to your final destination:

RELEASE

You hope no one heard the million farts you let out before you exploded but at this point YOLO

You are so HAPPY you made it to the toilet CONGRATULATIONS

you made it without actually shitting yourself you might have gotten a bit of a back splash but you made it and I am so HAPPY

you clean up shop

then you remember fuck I wiped too much idk if its all going to FLUSH

So you panic

To flush or not to flush???

so you suck it up and just go for it

SHIT IS GETTING REAL

Everything is coming up and you do the panic dance

I also found this other gif which doesn't really apply to MY panic dance but its fucking great so I have to share it:

Isn't it great lol

yaaas yaaas yaaas

OK

You go straight for the plunger:

You cant help but think how many dirty hands have touch this too

WORK IT GIRL

(poo to the face has never actually happened to me FYI)

It finally starts to go down and you have never been oh so relieved.

This panic attack happens every 2-3 months lololol

the End

(yes i do talk a lot about poo I know but someone has too!)

Once a upon a time....

There was a kid that didn't know about 

the 

GIF Life

So I just want to take the little time I have in my hands

to give him a round of applause

and a warm welcome

to the wonderful life of gifs

May I ask how have you coped with life without it?

Gotta Jet

Byeeeee